If it is possible I am both a light and sound sleeper. I am normally asleep within minutes of my head hitting the pillow and stay out until daylight comes through the curtains. The minor exceptions to this rule is when the sheets cover my face or someone (The Lovely Girlfriend) touches me. I know how crazy this sounds, I share a bed with someone but they are not allowed to come in contact with me. To clarify, I have no problem cuddling, snuggling, spooning or whatever the cool kids are calling it these days. I fully understand just how adorable I am and would never deny My Lovely Girlfriend the chance to saddle up next to all of this (and all of this is growing by the day). Once it's bedtime, those activities must end and we have to adjourn to our separate sides until morning. If at anytime during the night she reaches over and touches me I wake up immediately. For the life of me I don't know why this is. Also, I do not wake up if at some point while sleeping I stretch out and rest a hand on her. Which makes me a hypocrite even while sleeping.
We are lucky enough to sleep each night in a California King sized bed. That bed is so damn big a third person could join us (I've asked, she's not having it) so the no-touch sleeping rule rarely comes up. Just last night, while fighting a cold (with a potent cocktail of two types of nighttime cold meds), I managed to sleep soundly through My Lovely Girlfriends exit to the couch due to my snoring. So she claims, I swear to you I've never heard myself snore. She seemed far too angry with me this morning when I found her in the living room covered in a thin blanket for me to ask if she had tried to get me to stop. Granted, I was so out of it thanks to the meds that I came dangerously close to wetting the bed around two or three in the morning but I still believe that my inability to sleep through even a brush of the hand across my back would have halted the snoring, albeit briefly.
I don't think I am alone on this. I've spoken with a number of friends, both male and female, that agree with me, sleeping time is not cuddle time. Additionally, I am not bringing this up as a criticism of my Lovely Girlfriend. She likes her space while she sleeps too. She's not as militant as I am about it but she's just as likely to push me off her should I roll over too close. No, the reason I am bringing this up is for all the men and women that are trapped under the yoke (or arm or leg) of their significant others incessant cuddling. It is time that the No-Touchers stood up, linked arms (until they need their rest and just want to be left alone) and took to the streets to make this issue heard. We're Here! We're Sleeping! Get Off of Us!
We are lucky enough to sleep each night in a California King sized bed. That bed is so damn big a third person could join us (I've asked, she's not having it) so the no-touch sleeping rule rarely comes up. Just last night, while fighting a cold (with a potent cocktail of two types of nighttime cold meds), I managed to sleep soundly through My Lovely Girlfriends exit to the couch due to my snoring. So she claims, I swear to you I've never heard myself snore. She seemed far too angry with me this morning when I found her in the living room covered in a thin blanket for me to ask if she had tried to get me to stop. Granted, I was so out of it thanks to the meds that I came dangerously close to wetting the bed around two or three in the morning but I still believe that my inability to sleep through even a brush of the hand across my back would have halted the snoring, albeit briefly.
I don't think I am alone on this. I've spoken with a number of friends, both male and female, that agree with me, sleeping time is not cuddle time. Additionally, I am not bringing this up as a criticism of my Lovely Girlfriend. She likes her space while she sleeps too. She's not as militant as I am about it but she's just as likely to push me off her should I roll over too close. No, the reason I am bringing this up is for all the men and women that are trapped under the yoke (or arm or leg) of their significant others incessant cuddling. It is time that the No-Touchers stood up, linked arms (until they need their rest and just want to be left alone) and took to the streets to make this issue heard. We're Here! We're Sleeping! Get Off of Us!
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